J Ho, What Are You Smoking?

Yesterday, in my letterbox, a little package was delivered, direct from the desk of Prime Minister John Howard entitled, “Talking with kids about drugs”. I’ve seen the adds, and secretly I hoped that one day soon I might get the opportunity to glimpse into the government’s new proactive approach to curbing the drug epidemic within our society.

Most of you would no doubt join with me in greeting such a move by the government with no small measure of scepticism. But I must confess that the brochure is more competently assembled that I had expected.

Nonetheless I thought I would still point out a few foibles.

“In 2004 10 percent of sentenced prisoners were imprisoned for drug related offences”. Therefore 90 percent of the bane of society rests on other causes. Where’s the brochure entitled, “Talking with kids about not becoming a child-molesting psychopath”?

“Will your children listen to you?” This supposition was answered with a resounding “yes”, on the proviso that parents be informed, up-front and honest. If my mum refers to my first blow job as “heavy petting”, what the hell is she going to refer to my first snow cone as?

And, how many parents, being honest, would know the first thing to say? But in defence, it’s probably enough for parents like most of ours to just get the message across that they don’t want us doing it.

Potential Problems of Ecstasy: Thermal meltdown?! What The Fuck?!?! Don’t they make kids these days with automatic thermal overload relief mechanisms?

These are just a couple which jumped out at me during a quick peruse. There is some well researched information in the booklet, so I can see some benefit.

But lets open the floor to comment. Any obscure items jump out at you?